Ann Tinkham is a writer based in Boulder, Colorado. She has coauthored a nonfiction book, "Climbing
Mountains in Stilettos" (SourceBooks, 2007). Her fiction has appeared in All Things Girl, Apt, Dark Sky, Double
Dare Press, Edifice Wrecked, Hiss Quarterly, Lily, Miranda, MotherVerse, Scruffy Dog Review, Slow Trains, Stone
Table Review, Syntax, Toasted Cheese, Wild Violet, and Writethis.com. http://www.boulderbadgirls.com/
Mountains in Stilettos" (SourceBooks, 2007). Her fiction has appeared in All Things Girl, Apt, Dark Sky, Double
Dare Press, Edifice Wrecked, Hiss Quarterly, Lily, Miranda, MotherVerse, Scruffy Dog Review, Slow Trains, Stone
Table Review, Syntax, Toasted Cheese, Wild Violet, and Writethis.com. http://www.boulderbadgirls.com/
Defying Gravity
Most people run away with the circus, but Zoe ran away from it. Not because of creepy clowns or unsavory
ringmasters. No, not because of that.
When Zoe auditioned for Bartholomew Barkley III, a man with sprouting hair, beady eyes, and a bulbous nose, she
scrambled up satiny red strands of cloth. She wrapped herself in one piece of silk, disappeared as if in a cocoon and
then reappeared, having twisted one strand around her ankle. Zoe threw her petite body into a swirling freefall, and
caught herself at the last minute with the loop around her ankle. She then looped both strands around her legs and
arched backwards to catch the fabric in a flying backbend, twirling all the while. Zoe fell into splits, straddled between
the strands. She slid the silk around her waist and, as the fabric unraveled, twirled to the ground. Zoe curtsied to BB
III, all 100 lbs of her. As she dipped, her chocolate cherry ringlets bounced every which way and her dimples
parenthetically set off her slightly off-kilter smile. Her wide grin looked as if it had been misplaced -- a Mrs. Potato Head
smile on a Tater Tot face. Zoe's sunken eyes looked sullen even when she smiled. Her face was a work in contrasts.
Big, small; happy, sad; crooked, straight.
To BB III, she looked as if she were barely of age, making love to the cloth, becoming enveloped in it, straddling,
twisting, and embracing it. BB III was sure this would be a crowd pleaser for the gents. He featured big animals for the
kids, cute little animals for the ladies, and now an adolescent fabric dancer for his male audience.
BB III watched, mesmerized -- having never seen an aerialist so talented -- although he would never admit this to her
in her short stint with the circus. He made a point of keeping his performers guessing for fear of them running off with
the Froggy Circus, his term of derision for Cirque de Soleil.
With a flat affect, BB III said, "Thank you Miss Jacobsen. We'll review your video in committee, and give you a call
sometime in the next few weeks if we're interested. Otherwise, you won't hear from us." She left, unsure of the
competition she faced, unsure of his reaction, unsure even of her talent.
He phoned that night -- only hours after her audition -- and invited her to join the Barkley Brothers Circus. She
celebrated in silk in her parent's back yard by performing a stunt no aerialist in history had ever been able to do. Only
the night crawlers and prowlers witnessed this monumental feat. It would become a regular part of her act.
***
A month after joining the circus, Zoe was awakened before dawn in her trailer by a relentless clanking sound. Her
subconscious had incorporated it into her dream state by conjuring up a chain gang of circus clowns in black and white
stripes working on a railroad. Moments of silence were punctuated by the sound of a heavy object crashing against a
trailer wall and reverberating through the circus camp. She tried to tune it out by pulling a pillow over her head, but
the metallic crashes stalked her. Zoe threw on her sweats and emerged from the trailer toward the clanking sound
emanating from the animal cages. The black curtain of night was drawing up, casting faint hues on the black and white
world. Trailer lights sparkled in the darkness and created a surreal aura in the temporary world of the traveling circus.
Zoe discovered one of the elephants, the smallest of the bunch, slamming her trunk against the cage door as if trying
to free herself from captivity. The others were either standing motionless or meandering around the dirt-floored cage
in a daze.
Zoe approached the agitated elephant and called out to her. "Enough already! I'm trying to get some sleep. We all
have to perform today and you're not helping things with your racket. Take a chill pill, will you?"
The elephant paused, swaying her giant ears and trunk to gaze at Zoe. She blinked several times, slid her trunk into
her mouth and swung it out again. Then she moved her head back, swinging her trunk out in front of her and focused
on Zoe again, blinking in slow motion. She noticed large beads of sweat cascading down the creature's wrinkled face.
Zoe could have sworn the elephant was trying to make sense of her message and communicate something. An eerie
feeling swept over her, as if she and the elephant had an understanding. Not possible, Zoe thought as she scurried
out of the pungent animal cages toward her trailer. The scent was that of an overheated hamster cage.
At 4:30 am, it was still too early for the circus performers and trainers to be stirring in their trailers, but Zoe knew
getting back to sleep wasn't in the cards. She brewed herself a fresh cup of French roast and sat on her trailer steps,
warming her hands on her mug, wondering what had just happened.
***
Three weeks and five cities later in St. Louis, there was word that animal rights protesters were swarming in front of
the circus entrance with their creepy circus master masks, bloody elephant costumes, photos of mistreated circus
animals, and protest signs, pestering circus goers. Among the signs displayed was one that read: Barkley Brothers
Abuses Animals: Ask Us—We Worked There.
For God's sake, let the children enjoy the circus the way I did, Zoe wanted to say to the meddling protesters. Why
everything in modern life had become a political issue, she didn't understand. The world had become far too politicized
and had lost its sense of wonder, joy, and playfulness. People were claiming abuse at every turn -- from school
playgrounds where children weren't allowed to touch each other anymore, to circuses where kids couldn't enjoy
animals without the accusations of animal rights protesters.
To quell the protests, the elephant act was preceded by a video explaining that the elephants were treated humanely
and given proper care and attention.
Zoe knew, because the ringmaster and owners made it perfectly clear, that the traditional circuses were at risk for
going under if they lost their big animal acts, so critical were the tigers and elephants to the fiscal health of the
circuses. Zoe's dream -- to run away with the circus -- was being realized and she felt that the animal rights people
would eventually snatch it away.
She was tempted to give the protesters a piece of her mind, but circus policy prohibited performers from interacting
with protesters; only the public relations people were allowed to speak on behalf of the circus after being thoroughly
briefed by their legal counsel.
***
During opening night in Denver, Zoe counted only five elephants as she clung to her silk at the top of the tent. Jujube,
the young one, was missing. After performing and bowing in every direction to thunderous applause, Zoe made her
way to the animal cages to check on her.
As she approached, she heard a whacking sound that increased in tempo and force. She couldn't believe her eyes. The
head animal trainer was using chains to whip Jujube's legs and behind. Her front and hind legs were chained to a pole
so she couldn't move away from the beatings. The trainer was viciously attacking, yelling at, cursing, and shocking the
elephant. Jujube was emitting agonizing screams while recoiling from the assaults. He then struck the elephant with a
bull hook, sunk it into her flesh, and twisted it back and forth until she screamed in pain. Zoe switched her cell phone
to video and taped the torture session.
Then she hid behind the big cat cages until the coast was clear. She leaned into the elephant cage and spoke to
Jujube, trying to figure out how to free her from the shackles.
"Jujube, sweetie, I'm so, so sorry," Zoe called out.
"What are you doing here? Performers are not permitted back here during off hours," scolded a harsh booming voice.
Zoe was startled. She thought she was alone with Jujube.
"A better question would be -- what were you doing to her? Is the video we show every night to thousands of people
about the humane treatment of elephants a lie?" Zoe shouted, feeling betrayed by the hypocrisy of the circus.
"Trust me. These are just standard operating procedures for a circus." The trainer walked over and summoned her to
the exit.
"You call whipping the living daylights out of an animal standard operating procedures?" Zoe didn't budge.
"It's in her best interest. She has to learn how to perform. Otherwise, she'll be sent away. Now listen, you need to
leave right now."
"Where would she be sent?" Zoe asked.
"Wherever. A zoo, where life is no better than here. Believe me."
"Anything is better than this. Maybe those protesters are right."
"Do yourself a favor. If you ever so much as mention protesters to the owners or ringmaster, you'll be history," said
the trainer.
"At least take those chains off her. Let her roam free in her cage," Zoe pleaded.
The trainer, who had no response to her plea, practically shoved her away from the elephant cage. Zoe saw that this
man was an expert in forcing creatures to go against their wills.
She watched as he moved from the elephant cage to the lion cage. The doors connecting the cages weren't locked.
Although Zoe didn't know it then, this data collection would soon be critical to Jujube.
***
Each night during the elephant act, Zoe would climb the red silk, hand over hand, satiny strand between her legs, to
the top of the tent and wait. From this vantage point, she watched Mango, Kiwi, Papaya, Dwarf Paw Paw, Kaki, and
Jujube wow the crowd with their soccer skills. They juggled, kicked, and tossed the ball with their trunks. With each
trick, the collective "oohs and ahs" of the crowd wafted to the top of the tent and were absorbed by Zoe. Thus she
knew the importance of the elephants to the survival of the circus. As much as she liked to believe it was she who was
the greatest show on earth, she knew she played second fiddle to the magnificent pachyderms.
Her act began after the elephant finale when they were made to squat on portable toilets and look like they were taking
a dump. Sound effects of farting and dropping giant loads wafted through the air and the crowd roared in delight. In
Wichita, 25 performances after her first, she felt sickened by the elephant humiliation. When the crimson spotlights
shone on her tiny body wrapped in red silk, she froze in rage and refused to perform. The tango music lilted while the
lights -- magenta, violet, indigo, and crimson danced around her still figure. She could sense the crowd's apprehension
and fear that something was terribly wrong. The lighting technician quickly shifted the beams to the floor and the
Russians on horses were cued with Theme from the Bolsheviks. As the horses galloped in with the Russians standing
on and slipping and flipping off the sides of the horses, Zoe slid down to the dirt floor of the circus tent, hardly
noticed, except by one person.
After the show, Rupert, the ringmaster, barged into her dressing room, unannounced. He wore his bleach blonde
toupee, tight red cummerbund and bow tie, extra tight leggings with an unnecessary dance cup accentuating his
bulge. Rupert clutched a whip, and she could have sworn he was about to use it on her. His face was as red as his bow
tie, "What in God's name happened up there, Zoe? What the hell were you thinking? That doesn't happen in my circus.
You pull one more of those and you're a goner! Do you understand me?" Then he cracked his whip in the air. "I'm not
leaving until you tell me what happened." He stood over her, stroking the leather whip with his chubby fingers.
"I don't like the pooping elephant routine. It's offensive."
"Well, if you were the artistic director, we'd have something to discuss. Wouldn't we? But you're just a pole dancer."
He chuckled to himself.
"Aerialist."
"Whatever."
"The toilet act is unnecessary and demeaning. Would you do it -- shit on the toilet in front of thousands of people?"
"No, but the clowns would and have."
"The clowns have a choice. The elephants don't."
"Next time I want artistic direction from you, Little Miss Upstart, I'll ask you. Until then, just climb your rope, put out
and shut up." Rupert and his whip exited.
"It's silk," she called after him and then added, "you moron."
***
As Zoe was returning to her trailer after hanging out with the trapeze artist, she noticed that her trailer door was
cracked open. Strange, I thought I closed my door. She whipped out her Swiss army knife -- not the best defense,
but better than nothing. As she pushed open the door with her pocketknife leading the way, she was startled by a
man's silhouette.
"Who are you and what are you doing in my trailer?" Zoe demanded.
"It's circus policy that if we suspect a performer is compromising circus security, we have the authority to investigate
without prior authorization," said Mr. Barkley in his most official voice. She dropped her knife-holding hand by her side,
but didn't fold the knife into its base.
"On the outside, this is called breaking and entering, Mr. Barkley. But, apparently you don't always adhere to the laws
on the outside. What exactly are you investigating?"
"I'm not at liberty to say. It would compromise circus security."
He stood in the middle of her trailer like a ringmaster taking control of the rings. "Listen, I hear you were witness to an
elephant beating. You must understand that the trainer has been suspended without pay. Do you know that what you
saw is not tolerated by this circus? You will not speak a word of this to anyone. Is that clear? Now if this leaks to the
press, I'll know the source. Let's just say I'll see to it that you never perform again in any circus."
"Are you threatening me?" Zoe asked.
"It's not a threat; it's a promise," he replied with his brows knit together and his mouth a straight line.
"Well, you might rethink your threat when you see this," Zoe displayed the elephant beating video on her phone.
He watched for a few seconds as the animal trainer used a bullhorn on Jujube. His posture stiffened and his face
tightened; it almost looked as though he would lunge for the phone, but he resisted the temptation. "For a little thing,
you sure are a menace. Listen, I must see significant improvements in your upholding the Barkley Brothers' promise or
you and your silk threads will walk." Mr. Barkley ducked out of her trailer and slammed the door, shaking her compact
circus home.
Zoe knew that she had passed the point of no return with Mr. Barkley, but she also had a sense that he would keep
her around long enough to confiscate her cell phone with the damning evidence and then cut her loose.
Instead of going to bed, Zoe hopped on her computer and began to formulate a plan driven by compassion and
impulsivity and the belief that morality was on her side -- a combination that may be fatally flawed, unless the wings of
providence swoop in and carry the plan to safety.
Zoe stayed up all night mapping, plotting, diagramming, and calculating. Math wasn't her strong suit, but whimsical
dreams were. Despite this, she hatched what she thought was a clever plan. During the early morning hours when the
animals were stirring and the carnies were snoring, she had delusions of becoming a sleuth or a private eye or even a
cross between Spider Woman and Bat Girl -- scaling buildings and catapulting herself into inaccessible places. In
spandex, of course.
There was no time to waste.
***
The following day after her performance, she packed up her cherished items, laptop, and aerial equipment. She had a
close call when one of her clown friends barged in and asked with a yuk-yuk if she were running away from the circus.
"Oh, no, just getting organized. You know me -- in a perpetual state of chaos."
Her heart beat out of her little bird cage chest as she shooed him, his clown afro and big red nose out of her trailer.
"You sure know how to make a clown cry," he said.
Zoe made a run for it, with her backpack and aerial gear, as soon as the last trailer light was extinguished. Lucky for
her mission that the tents were illuminated from the outside to create a starry, starry night effect for passersby and
circus enthusiasts.
The trickiest part of her plan was to climb up a cable that spanned the entire height of the animal tent. But having
scaled everything from poles to fabrics to ropes, Zoe felt confident that she could make it to the top. Before mounting
the cable, she slipped on trapeze gloves with gripping material. Then, like an upside down tightrope walker, she inched
her way up the cable to the apex of the tent. Playing to crowds of thousands was never as nerve-wracking as this.
She felt wobbly, shaky, and unstable. Noodle knees, they called it in the circus biz -- something she hadn't felt since
circus arts school.
At the apex of the tent, she gripped the tip and peeked into its small opening. Zoe would have to secure her rigging to
the outside of the tent. She clipped her carabineers to two opposing cables. Normally rigging should be more
extensive, but she would have to forgo a secure setup for a makeshift one. In circus arts school, the instructors
warned aerialists to never, ever cut corners when rigging.
Like a seamstress threading a needle, she poked the fabric through the slight opening at the top of the tent. She
watched it cascade down to the…lions! She would have to lower herself into a den of lions to get to the elephants!
She hadn't figured lion taming into her plan.
Zoe popped her head through the top like a malfunctioning jack-in-the box and saw that the elephants were catty-
corner from the lions. If she could get past the lions, she knew that the cages were conjoined without locks.
Had she had a tremulous nature, Zoe would not have attempted the elephant heist through the lion's den. But
cowardly girls don't join the circus as aerialists. Performing death-defying feats was her specialty. As Zoe slithered
down the fabric, she kept her eyes peeled on the lions. A lioness in the corner had spotted her and had started to
pace. Zoe wrapped herself up in the fabric cocoon -- attempting to give the impression that she was a giant red
creature towering over the restless feline. In her cocoon, she descended the rest of the way. The feline was frozen
with the look of a curious but crotchety old man. When Zoe's feet touched the earth, she whispered to the lion in a
comforting tone, the way she used to talk to her family cat. She crept sideways toward the cage door -- never turning
her back on the lion. The lion moved toward her, and as panic seized Zoe's arms and legs, the lion opened her mouth
and released a giant, toothy, tongue-protruding yawn.
"Oh, I don't scare you; I bore you. That's good. That's very, very good," she said, waves of relief relaxing her taut
limbs. The bored feline plopped down and rested her giant head on her paws.
Zoe clicked open the cage door handle, walked through a hall that led directly to the elephants' back entrance. Pausing
to breathe a sigh of relief over not becoming kitty chow, she didn't worry that her plan would fail or that a circus top
dog might be on her trail. She also didn't think about the strands of fabric flapping in the lion's cage -- evidence more
damning than fingerprints.
***
Zoe led Jujube down criss-crossing roads to the highway. After two hours of cajoling, the pair finally reached the
highway at 3:20 am. Zoe was now intimately familiar with the meaning of "lumbering elephant." To move Jujube along,
she bribed her with bananas, mangos, and apples she had pilfered from the circus cafeteria.
The main road was a long stretch of deserted highway. Occasional trucks would pass, but didn't spot Zoe and Jujube
in the shadows. Holding her trunk, she guided her to the other side of the highway and stood there, thinking about
the thrill she was about to give weary truckers. She hadn't thought of what might happen if law enforcement officials
found her or had she considered the trouble she'd be in for stealing circus property.
Thirty minutes had passed before she spotted a dim light in the distance. She stuck her thumb out, although she was
well aware that her thumb would be upstaged by a hitchhiking elephant. The headlights brightened as the car
approached and then whizzed past. It was a sports car doing at least 100 mph. Several minutes later, she saw a truck
illuminated with cab lights; she hoped it might be big enough to fit Jujube, who was now fidgety. A fidgety elephant
was a bit problematic, Zoe discovered. And she had nothing else to bribe her with; Jujube had depleted her backpack
full of fruit in a span of two hours.
"Jujube, hold still," she pleaded as the truck flashed its high beams and then slowed to a stop next to her.
"Well, God damn! God damn! Darlin', I was clearing the angel dust from my eyes back there and shaking myself awake,
thinking I had done near started to doze. Am I hallucinatin' or is that an elephant you got there, little missy?" shouted
the trucker, with his arm resting on the side of his cab.
"Sir, you're not hallucinating. It is indeed an elephant. Her name is Jujube."
"And my name is Billy Ray. Are you two runnin' away from home or somethin'?"
"Oh no, sir."
"For Lord's sake, don't tell me she's your pet. Jeez, people are going off the deep end with pets these days. Back
when I was young, folks were just fine with puppies and kittens. Now people have to have exotics -- snakes, giant
lizards, and now... jiminey crickets, elephants."
"She's not my pet, sir."
"Well pardon me for pryin', but why are you hitchhikin' with an elephant at this ungodly hour? It ain't normal for a girl
to hitchhike at all, let alone with an elephant, you know."
Zoe looked up at Jujube and then back at Billy Ray. "Got enough room in there
for an elephant?"
Billy Ray was so tickled by her question; he slammed the side of his truck with his palm and let out a yelp that startled
Jujube. When he got a hold of himself and quelled the laughing aftershocks that sounded like hootin' and hollerin' with
a lid on them, he said, "Sorry little missy, I don't mean to offend, but this takes the cake for strange situations on the
road, you know?" Then like a kid trying not to laugh in class, he pinched his nose and asked, "Where you headed?"
"Hohenwald, Tennessee."
"What's down there?"
"Elephant sanctuary."
"You mean like a place where elephants can pray?"
"Something like that," Zoe said, thinking this could be a hard sell.
"Is this an elephant rescue or somethin'?" He gave Zoe a knowing wink and smiled a pumpkin smile. Billy Ray seemed
so proud of his inference that he appeared ready and willing to be an accomplice. "'Fraid I'm headed in the wrong
direction. Let me see if I can get my buddy who's trailin' me by 30 minutes. Hold your horses, er... elephants." His
hysterics threatened to resurface after his little funny, but he swallowed so hard his Adam's apple bobbed down and
up, and his giggles went down his gullet.
Billy Ray called his friend and discovered that highway patrol cars were on the trail of a hit and run.
"Well, I'll be damned. He says the highway patrol 're comin'. We've gotta hide you and your friend, missy. Otherwise,
they'll pick you up for hitchhikin' and I'm not sure what the charge would be for the elephant. That's one they
probably don't have in their books. Woo-wee! If this ain't the wildest night I've had in the last 25 years on the road!"
The only problem was that Jujube didn't want to cooperate with the plan.
"Don't they say, stubborn as an elephant?" Billy Ray commented as they pushed Jujube's behind in tandem to no
avail. Two hundred ninety pounds of humans pushing 7,000 pounds of elephant. Zoe had failed to include this in her
calculations.
"I think it's stubborn as a mule," said Zoe. "C'mon Jujube. C'mon," Zoe urged the elephant as she attempted to guide
her into the tractor-trailer. "Scoot!!"
"We can scare the bejesus out of her."
"No, I don't want to do that."
"It's either that or... those highway patrol men will be comin' along before you can say jack rabbit or, in this case,
Jujube elephant." He was clearly having the time of his life. Zoe was certain that hiding an elephant beat endless
stretches of open highway and cornfields any day. Cornfields!
"Hey, I think I know something that will work. Can you go grab some corn over there?" She pointed to the corn field.
"Maybe we'll lure her in with corn."
Sure enough, Billy Ray and Zoe moved 7,000 pounds of elephant with two kilos of corn. He lowered the automated
tractor-trailer door and told Zoe to get into his cab and duck.
"Don't want the fuzz to think there's any monkey business goin' on. Little do they know there's elephant business!"
He was in hysterics about his joke; Zoe faked a laugh for good measure. After all, he was her accomplice in the
elephant caper.
A few minutes later, the state troopers pulled up to Billy Ray's tractor-trailer. The troopers with wide brimmed hats
and stiff posture appeared from behind the tinted power window.
"Everything okay in there?" shouted the passenger-side trooper.
"A-OK, sirs! Couldn't be better!" answered Billy Ray with an A-OK sign to match.
"You're not having any trouble with your cab?" asked the trooper.
"Nope, she's runnin' like a champ." At the "p" in champ, Jujube kicked the trailer wall so hard, the truck shimmied. The
state troopers did a well-choreographed double take.
"What, you got a horse in there or something? You wouldn't be following regulations if that were the case," said the
trooper behind the wheel. "Gotta be traveling with a regulation trailer. I'm afraid we'd have to give you a citation and a
hefty fine for that."
"No, sir, the cargo shifts from time to time. That's all," said Billy Ray without hesitation.
"Might want to secure it before too long," said the passenger-side trooper, stating the obvious. Jujube kicked again,
with greater force. In her crunched and ducked position, Zoe felt like an appendage to her pounding heart. She
scrunched her eyes, shook her head, and begged Jujube to stop.
"Well, I'll be. You sure called it. I'll be spendin' some time securin' my cargo at the next truck stop. She'll be tight as a
drum," said Billy Ray. Zoe had to hand it to her accomplice; he was smooth and polished with the law. Some people's
super heroes were suave muscle men swooping down in capes; hers was now officially a hillbilly trucker.
The patrolmen conferred for a few minutes, their stiff hats tilting and straightening as they fiddled with their overly
equipped uniforms and squad car. Ten minutes after stopping to check on Billy Ray's truck, the troopers flipped on the
red, white, and blue flashers. Nothing quite as patriotic as enforcing the law.
Zoe's sigh of relief ricocheted back into her throat and became a lump she couldn't swallow. If she hadn't know any
better, she would have thought that her heart had come unhinged and had relocated to her head.
The passenger-side officer got out. "We're going to need to take a look for ourselves, there, mister. I can smell it
when something ain't right. Get out of your cab, hands in the air. Is there anyone else in the truck with you?"
Billy Ray didn't really know how to answer that. There were two someone elses -- a runaway girl and her storybook
pet. He wasn't sure, though, if elephants counted as someone or something.
"Sir, answer the question or I'll have to search the entirety of the truck."
Billy Ray shot Zoe a what-the-hell-do-we-do-now glance, and said, "Yes, there's someone else. She'll be right out." He
motioned with his startled eyeballs for her to come out of hiding. Then he jumped out of the cab with his hands up --
panicked on the inside, calm on the outside. He took his time opening the tractor-trailer, while he wracked his brain to
come up with a good story. His lame brain wasn't producing anything worth a can of beans. As he threw open the
door, the patrolman's face lit up like a little boy's at a circus. "Well, I'll be damned. My name ain't Gus, if that's not an
elephant. That there is a real-life honest-to-goodness elephant!" He repeated the words for his disbelieving eyes and
radioed his partner that he had to come see "the cargo" for himself. When he said "cargo," he let out an ironic snort.
The other state trooper raced around the cab, ready to assist his partner in this all-important mission, looked up, and
said, "Jesus H. Christ, it's an elephant! Gus, what do you know -- it's a god damned elephant!"
Bud, now trying his best to maintain a modicum of law enforcement composure said, "What are your plans concerning
this elephant? I don't s'pose you're the rightful owner now. Are you? You two with the circus or something?"
Billy Ray did some fast talking, "Yes, indeedy, this beaut sure is mine. We keep her down on the farm for hauling
crops, hay, and such. Best dern farm animal we've ever had. Better than a horse, donkey, and a mule rolled into one."
"A farm elephant. That's a new one, ain't it, Gus?"
"Why you hauling her around in your eighteen wheeler?" asked Gus.
"That's a fair question, sir. Well, it's a sad story, really. You see she's got some kind of serious condition with her
trunk -- clogged hose or something -- and ain't no vet in these parts can do elephant plumbing, as you can imagine. A
clogged hose on an elephant is like having plumbin', eatin', and grippin' problems all rolled into one. You can just
imagine the severity of that. So we have to take her to a special clinic down south."
"Where's that at?" asked Gus.
"Tennessee. Closest vet specializing in unclogging elephant trunks."
The patrolmen were stymied, unsure of their next move. Then Bud said, "Gus, what are the regulations concernin' the
transporting of elephants?"
Despite his attempts to be a law enforcement man in charge, Gus looked at Bud and let out an explosive guffaw. He
threw his head back and laughed the uncontrollable laugh of a man who normally kept his laughter under lock and key.
Bud puffed up his chest and tightened his arms flexed over his gun belt. He shot Gus a reprimanding glare and shook
his head at the unprofessionalism of his partner. But as Gus's laughter spiraled out of control, Bud couldn't hold back
any longer and released a belly laugh that could've been heard on the west side of Kansas.
There they were -- elephant thief, accomplice, and uproarious law enforcement officers, all peering up at an elephant's
rump, contemplating The Elephant Problem.
Keeping score in her head with each action and reaction, Zoe saw this as a very positive development in the elephant
caper. As she had learned from her stint with the circus, entertained folks are happy folks -- more lenient and
forgiving. She waited for their next move.
"Listen, here, what did you say your name was -- Billy Ray?" Gus asked.
"Yes, sir."
"And who's this here little lady you got with you?" Gus winked at Zoe.
"That's Sarah Jane, my youngest." Zoe dipped into an abbreviated curtsied to play along.
"Cutie pie -- that one. Gonna be a heartbreaker." Gus eyed Zoe up and down and up again.
Eyeballing was part of a state trooper's job perks, Zoe figured. If she didn't have an elephant rescue underway, she
might have shot him a get-your-eyeballs-off-my-body look. Instead she struck a coy pose -- biting her lip and casting
her gaze downward.
"Already is, sir. Already is," said Billy Ray, with a forlorn look on his face, shaking his head for effect.
"Bud and I have decided," although Bud hadn't decided a thing, "that we'll have to issue a citation for improper
elephant transport procedures. It'll be a $600 fine. Once you get her to where she's goin', and get her trunk
unclogged and all that, you'll have to make sure that you follow appropriate rules and regulations upon her return. If
you don't, we'll issue a warrant for your arrest for illegal elephant activities. Is that clear?"
"Yes, sir. I'll make sure it's by the letter of the law." He winked at Zoe, who had started breathing again.
Gus wrote up a ticket and handed it to Billy Ray, "Alright, drive safe now and good luck with your elephant plumbing
problem." As the state troopers walked off, Zoe heard Bud say, "Elephant transport procedures?" Gus and Bud broke
out in hysterics again.
Zoe had never seen such jolly state troopers in her life. She started to believe that Jujube was a talisman.
***
Four states, five truck stops, ten pit stops, seven kilos of corn, four hamburgers, and three six-packs of Coca Cola
got Zoe and Billy Ray to Hohenwald, Tennessee. As they drove past the sanctuary gates, Zoe's eyes rested on the
expanse of lush pastureland and barns.
"Well, now what?" asked Billy Ray.
Zoe's plan ended at "Arrive at the elephant sanctuary". "Um, I guess just let her out."
"I doubt they just want people dropping off random elephants," noted Billy Ray.
"I'm guessing it probably doesn't happen too often."
"No, Sarah Jane, you've got that right," he said. He had taken to calling her Sarah Jane after the state trooper
incident, and added that he wanted to adopt her. She thanked Billy Ray kindly, but told him the father position was
already filled.
As they were deciding what to do next, a woman with blonde pigtails, high color, and dirty overalls was approaching
the truck with a stern expression and her arms in a stop-go-back position. "Can I help you?" she called up to Zoe and
the Billy Ray. "Who are you? Unauthorized vehicles are not allowed on this property. You must leave the premises
immediately," she ordered as she pointed toward the exit gate.
Zoe leaned out of the truck window and shouted down to her. "I've, well, we've rescued an elephant named Jujube
from the Barkley Brothers Circus and I was hoping you'd provide a home to her. She's a young one."
The pigtailed woman's stern face softened and she extended her arms, beckoning Zoe out of the truck. Zoe obliged
and jumped down. From military guard to nurturing earth mama in a matter of seconds, the woman gave Zoe an
extended hug -- longer than Zoe's closest friends or relatives would ever embrace her. As she pushed Zoe back to
take a look at her, she said, "Call me Ellie, short for, what else, elephant! Bless you, child. Bless you." She put her arm
around her and guided her to the back of the truck, as if it were pre-orchestrated for Ellie to take the plan from here.
"I assume our angel is back here." She laughed. "Silly me, where else would she be?"
Zoe called Billy Ray and asked him to open the trailer.
"Dear, dear, dear. Sweet Jujube. How long have you had her on the road?"
"16 hours."
"Oh my. Poor dear. I'll bet she's famished." Billy Ray pried open the door and Jujube's tail end was exposed. "Oh, she's
a beauty!"
Zoe looked up at Jujube's behind, puzzled and said, "Um, how can you tell?"
"Listen; she's in good shape compared to most. We get them after they've suffered years and years of abuse. You've
done a great thing—the best years of her life are ahead of her. The others will adore her!" Ellie's pigtails bobbed as
she bounced up and down on her tiptoes.
Zoe wondered if spending so much time with elephants made a person a little kooky.
"So, she's a female—right?"
"Yes, why?"
"Oh, thank goddess." Ellie put her hands together in prayer. "We only take female elephants."
"Really? Why?"
"Because it isn't natural for adult female and male Asian elephants to live together. Asian elephants are matriarchal by
nature; they live in herds of related females and only very young males."
As Ellie maneuvered Jujube out of the truck, Zoe noticed a nearby elephant that looked as though she were holding a
paintbrush with her trunk and painting on a giant canvas secured to a tree.
"Um, Ellie, what is that elephant doing?" Zoe asked as she pointed at the painting elephant.
Without looking over, Ellie replied, "Oh, that's Tempo. She's one of our most accomplished acrylic artists. Once we get
Jujube settled, you should go take a look at her work. We display it in our gallery."
Zoe mouthed "wow" but no words came out. This was truly not the circus anymore.
As Ellie nuzzled with, whispered to and coddled Jujube, she said, "You might be interested to know that Tempo is our
most famous elephant. She was in the 1970s show, Born Free. Of course, you're too young to remember that show.
She was born in Uganda in 1971 and was orphaned because of poachers."
After Ellie made sure that Jujube had enough food and water, she invited Zoe and Billy Ray into the administrative
offices for tea and biscuits. Billy Ray declined, saying he'd take a catnap in his cab.
"So is she safe? I mean if the circus comes looking for her?" Zoe asked, munching on a biscuit.
"No, she's not completely safe. Legally, the circus has the right to take her back. And they can press charges against
you for stealing their property."
"I don't think they will," said Zoe.
"How can you be so sure?" Ellie asked.
Zoe held up her cell phone and played the video of the elephant beating for Ellie. "Let's just say this footage -- as
rough as it is -- would look awfully suspicious next to the we-coddle-our-elephants video that they play for the crowd
every night."
"Please, please turn that off. I can't bear it," Ellie said as she turned her face away. "So they know you have this?"
"Yes, Mr. Barkley himself saw it after he broke into my trailer one night." Zoe laughed and continued, "I gave him a
private screening of the evidence. In response, he told me if I spilled the beans, he would make sure I never worked in
any circus ever again."
"I suppose you're right, then, about the circus not pressing charges or coming after Jujube. Thank God. But are you
concerned that he might have the power to blackball you?"
"Maybe with the traditional circuses, but I doubt he has much clout with Cirque de Soleil. Fortunately, they don't see
eye to eye."
***
As Zoe and Billy Ray left the sanctuary, she saw an elephant wading in a pond, spouting water like an elegant fountain.
She dipped her trunk into the pond and trumpeted the water all over her body. On closer inspection, Zoe saw that it
was Jujube, wily, muddy and wet. Zoe could have sworn Jujube was smiling at her.
***
As Elementala was opening in Toronto, Zoe learned that the Barkley Brothers Circus was under investigation for using
bullhorns and chaining their elephants. Although she wasn't sure who had been the source of leak, she was pleased
with this development.
Elementala, the newest Cirque de Soleil show, opened with bonfires on stage and smoke wafting up to the top of the
tent. Fire dancers and breathers played with, juggled, and swallowed the flames. The show featured the four elements
-- air, fire, water, and earth.
Fire gave way to air -- Zoe's part of the show. Starting in the flames and ascending through smoke, she would slither
up a transparent fabric swath to the top of the tent. She looked as if she were dancing on air, arching, swinging,
plunging, and twirling while defying gravity. The crowd murmured, yelped, and cheered as she performed. As she
descended, air gave way to water. No one seemed to miss the elephants.
Every time Zoe danced on fabric, she imagined Jujube reveling in his pond. Jujube in water, the Barkley Brothers Circus
under fire, she in air, and Billy Ray traversing the earth below.
Elemental bliss.
Most people run away with the circus, but Zoe ran away from it. Not because of creepy clowns or unsavory
ringmasters. No, not because of that.
When Zoe auditioned for Bartholomew Barkley III, a man with sprouting hair, beady eyes, and a bulbous nose, she
scrambled up satiny red strands of cloth. She wrapped herself in one piece of silk, disappeared as if in a cocoon and
then reappeared, having twisted one strand around her ankle. Zoe threw her petite body into a swirling freefall, and
caught herself at the last minute with the loop around her ankle. She then looped both strands around her legs and
arched backwards to catch the fabric in a flying backbend, twirling all the while. Zoe fell into splits, straddled between
the strands. She slid the silk around her waist and, as the fabric unraveled, twirled to the ground. Zoe curtsied to BB
III, all 100 lbs of her. As she dipped, her chocolate cherry ringlets bounced every which way and her dimples
parenthetically set off her slightly off-kilter smile. Her wide grin looked as if it had been misplaced -- a Mrs. Potato Head
smile on a Tater Tot face. Zoe's sunken eyes looked sullen even when she smiled. Her face was a work in contrasts.
Big, small; happy, sad; crooked, straight.
To BB III, she looked as if she were barely of age, making love to the cloth, becoming enveloped in it, straddling,
twisting, and embracing it. BB III was sure this would be a crowd pleaser for the gents. He featured big animals for the
kids, cute little animals for the ladies, and now an adolescent fabric dancer for his male audience.
BB III watched, mesmerized -- having never seen an aerialist so talented -- although he would never admit this to her
in her short stint with the circus. He made a point of keeping his performers guessing for fear of them running off with
the Froggy Circus, his term of derision for Cirque de Soleil.
With a flat affect, BB III said, "Thank you Miss Jacobsen. We'll review your video in committee, and give you a call
sometime in the next few weeks if we're interested. Otherwise, you won't hear from us." She left, unsure of the
competition she faced, unsure of his reaction, unsure even of her talent.
He phoned that night -- only hours after her audition -- and invited her to join the Barkley Brothers Circus. She
celebrated in silk in her parent's back yard by performing a stunt no aerialist in history had ever been able to do. Only
the night crawlers and prowlers witnessed this monumental feat. It would become a regular part of her act.
***
A month after joining the circus, Zoe was awakened before dawn in her trailer by a relentless clanking sound. Her
subconscious had incorporated it into her dream state by conjuring up a chain gang of circus clowns in black and white
stripes working on a railroad. Moments of silence were punctuated by the sound of a heavy object crashing against a
trailer wall and reverberating through the circus camp. She tried to tune it out by pulling a pillow over her head, but
the metallic crashes stalked her. Zoe threw on her sweats and emerged from the trailer toward the clanking sound
emanating from the animal cages. The black curtain of night was drawing up, casting faint hues on the black and white
world. Trailer lights sparkled in the darkness and created a surreal aura in the temporary world of the traveling circus.
Zoe discovered one of the elephants, the smallest of the bunch, slamming her trunk against the cage door as if trying
to free herself from captivity. The others were either standing motionless or meandering around the dirt-floored cage
in a daze.
Zoe approached the agitated elephant and called out to her. "Enough already! I'm trying to get some sleep. We all
have to perform today and you're not helping things with your racket. Take a chill pill, will you?"
The elephant paused, swaying her giant ears and trunk to gaze at Zoe. She blinked several times, slid her trunk into
her mouth and swung it out again. Then she moved her head back, swinging her trunk out in front of her and focused
on Zoe again, blinking in slow motion. She noticed large beads of sweat cascading down the creature's wrinkled face.
Zoe could have sworn the elephant was trying to make sense of her message and communicate something. An eerie
feeling swept over her, as if she and the elephant had an understanding. Not possible, Zoe thought as she scurried
out of the pungent animal cages toward her trailer. The scent was that of an overheated hamster cage.
At 4:30 am, it was still too early for the circus performers and trainers to be stirring in their trailers, but Zoe knew
getting back to sleep wasn't in the cards. She brewed herself a fresh cup of French roast and sat on her trailer steps,
warming her hands on her mug, wondering what had just happened.
***
Three weeks and five cities later in St. Louis, there was word that animal rights protesters were swarming in front of
the circus entrance with their creepy circus master masks, bloody elephant costumes, photos of mistreated circus
animals, and protest signs, pestering circus goers. Among the signs displayed was one that read: Barkley Brothers
Abuses Animals: Ask Us—We Worked There.
For God's sake, let the children enjoy the circus the way I did, Zoe wanted to say to the meddling protesters. Why
everything in modern life had become a political issue, she didn't understand. The world had become far too politicized
and had lost its sense of wonder, joy, and playfulness. People were claiming abuse at every turn -- from school
playgrounds where children weren't allowed to touch each other anymore, to circuses where kids couldn't enjoy
animals without the accusations of animal rights protesters.
To quell the protests, the elephant act was preceded by a video explaining that the elephants were treated humanely
and given proper care and attention.
Zoe knew, because the ringmaster and owners made it perfectly clear, that the traditional circuses were at risk for
going under if they lost their big animal acts, so critical were the tigers and elephants to the fiscal health of the
circuses. Zoe's dream -- to run away with the circus -- was being realized and she felt that the animal rights people
would eventually snatch it away.
She was tempted to give the protesters a piece of her mind, but circus policy prohibited performers from interacting
with protesters; only the public relations people were allowed to speak on behalf of the circus after being thoroughly
briefed by their legal counsel.
***
During opening night in Denver, Zoe counted only five elephants as she clung to her silk at the top of the tent. Jujube,
the young one, was missing. After performing and bowing in every direction to thunderous applause, Zoe made her
way to the animal cages to check on her.
As she approached, she heard a whacking sound that increased in tempo and force. She couldn't believe her eyes. The
head animal trainer was using chains to whip Jujube's legs and behind. Her front and hind legs were chained to a pole
so she couldn't move away from the beatings. The trainer was viciously attacking, yelling at, cursing, and shocking the
elephant. Jujube was emitting agonizing screams while recoiling from the assaults. He then struck the elephant with a
bull hook, sunk it into her flesh, and twisted it back and forth until she screamed in pain. Zoe switched her cell phone
to video and taped the torture session.
Then she hid behind the big cat cages until the coast was clear. She leaned into the elephant cage and spoke to
Jujube, trying to figure out how to free her from the shackles.
"Jujube, sweetie, I'm so, so sorry," Zoe called out.
"What are you doing here? Performers are not permitted back here during off hours," scolded a harsh booming voice.
Zoe was startled. She thought she was alone with Jujube.
"A better question would be -- what were you doing to her? Is the video we show every night to thousands of people
about the humane treatment of elephants a lie?" Zoe shouted, feeling betrayed by the hypocrisy of the circus.
"Trust me. These are just standard operating procedures for a circus." The trainer walked over and summoned her to
the exit.
"You call whipping the living daylights out of an animal standard operating procedures?" Zoe didn't budge.
"It's in her best interest. She has to learn how to perform. Otherwise, she'll be sent away. Now listen, you need to
leave right now."
"Where would she be sent?" Zoe asked.
"Wherever. A zoo, where life is no better than here. Believe me."
"Anything is better than this. Maybe those protesters are right."
"Do yourself a favor. If you ever so much as mention protesters to the owners or ringmaster, you'll be history," said
the trainer.
"At least take those chains off her. Let her roam free in her cage," Zoe pleaded.
The trainer, who had no response to her plea, practically shoved her away from the elephant cage. Zoe saw that this
man was an expert in forcing creatures to go against their wills.
She watched as he moved from the elephant cage to the lion cage. The doors connecting the cages weren't locked.
Although Zoe didn't know it then, this data collection would soon be critical to Jujube.
***
Each night during the elephant act, Zoe would climb the red silk, hand over hand, satiny strand between her legs, to
the top of the tent and wait. From this vantage point, she watched Mango, Kiwi, Papaya, Dwarf Paw Paw, Kaki, and
Jujube wow the crowd with their soccer skills. They juggled, kicked, and tossed the ball with their trunks. With each
trick, the collective "oohs and ahs" of the crowd wafted to the top of the tent and were absorbed by Zoe. Thus she
knew the importance of the elephants to the survival of the circus. As much as she liked to believe it was she who was
the greatest show on earth, she knew she played second fiddle to the magnificent pachyderms.
Her act began after the elephant finale when they were made to squat on portable toilets and look like they were taking
a dump. Sound effects of farting and dropping giant loads wafted through the air and the crowd roared in delight. In
Wichita, 25 performances after her first, she felt sickened by the elephant humiliation. When the crimson spotlights
shone on her tiny body wrapped in red silk, she froze in rage and refused to perform. The tango music lilted while the
lights -- magenta, violet, indigo, and crimson danced around her still figure. She could sense the crowd's apprehension
and fear that something was terribly wrong. The lighting technician quickly shifted the beams to the floor and the
Russians on horses were cued with Theme from the Bolsheviks. As the horses galloped in with the Russians standing
on and slipping and flipping off the sides of the horses, Zoe slid down to the dirt floor of the circus tent, hardly
noticed, except by one person.
After the show, Rupert, the ringmaster, barged into her dressing room, unannounced. He wore his bleach blonde
toupee, tight red cummerbund and bow tie, extra tight leggings with an unnecessary dance cup accentuating his
bulge. Rupert clutched a whip, and she could have sworn he was about to use it on her. His face was as red as his bow
tie, "What in God's name happened up there, Zoe? What the hell were you thinking? That doesn't happen in my circus.
You pull one more of those and you're a goner! Do you understand me?" Then he cracked his whip in the air. "I'm not
leaving until you tell me what happened." He stood over her, stroking the leather whip with his chubby fingers.
"I don't like the pooping elephant routine. It's offensive."
"Well, if you were the artistic director, we'd have something to discuss. Wouldn't we? But you're just a pole dancer."
He chuckled to himself.
"Aerialist."
"Whatever."
"The toilet act is unnecessary and demeaning. Would you do it -- shit on the toilet in front of thousands of people?"
"No, but the clowns would and have."
"The clowns have a choice. The elephants don't."
"Next time I want artistic direction from you, Little Miss Upstart, I'll ask you. Until then, just climb your rope, put out
and shut up." Rupert and his whip exited.
"It's silk," she called after him and then added, "you moron."
***
As Zoe was returning to her trailer after hanging out with the trapeze artist, she noticed that her trailer door was
cracked open. Strange, I thought I closed my door. She whipped out her Swiss army knife -- not the best defense,
but better than nothing. As she pushed open the door with her pocketknife leading the way, she was startled by a
man's silhouette.
"Who are you and what are you doing in my trailer?" Zoe demanded.
"It's circus policy that if we suspect a performer is compromising circus security, we have the authority to investigate
without prior authorization," said Mr. Barkley in his most official voice. She dropped her knife-holding hand by her side,
but didn't fold the knife into its base.
"On the outside, this is called breaking and entering, Mr. Barkley. But, apparently you don't always adhere to the laws
on the outside. What exactly are you investigating?"
"I'm not at liberty to say. It would compromise circus security."
He stood in the middle of her trailer like a ringmaster taking control of the rings. "Listen, I hear you were witness to an
elephant beating. You must understand that the trainer has been suspended without pay. Do you know that what you
saw is not tolerated by this circus? You will not speak a word of this to anyone. Is that clear? Now if this leaks to the
press, I'll know the source. Let's just say I'll see to it that you never perform again in any circus."
"Are you threatening me?" Zoe asked.
"It's not a threat; it's a promise," he replied with his brows knit together and his mouth a straight line.
"Well, you might rethink your threat when you see this," Zoe displayed the elephant beating video on her phone.
He watched for a few seconds as the animal trainer used a bullhorn on Jujube. His posture stiffened and his face
tightened; it almost looked as though he would lunge for the phone, but he resisted the temptation. "For a little thing,
you sure are a menace. Listen, I must see significant improvements in your upholding the Barkley Brothers' promise or
you and your silk threads will walk." Mr. Barkley ducked out of her trailer and slammed the door, shaking her compact
circus home.
Zoe knew that she had passed the point of no return with Mr. Barkley, but she also had a sense that he would keep
her around long enough to confiscate her cell phone with the damning evidence and then cut her loose.
Instead of going to bed, Zoe hopped on her computer and began to formulate a plan driven by compassion and
impulsivity and the belief that morality was on her side -- a combination that may be fatally flawed, unless the wings of
providence swoop in and carry the plan to safety.
Zoe stayed up all night mapping, plotting, diagramming, and calculating. Math wasn't her strong suit, but whimsical
dreams were. Despite this, she hatched what she thought was a clever plan. During the early morning hours when the
animals were stirring and the carnies were snoring, she had delusions of becoming a sleuth or a private eye or even a
cross between Spider Woman and Bat Girl -- scaling buildings and catapulting herself into inaccessible places. In
spandex, of course.
There was no time to waste.
***
The following day after her performance, she packed up her cherished items, laptop, and aerial equipment. She had a
close call when one of her clown friends barged in and asked with a yuk-yuk if she were running away from the circus.
"Oh, no, just getting organized. You know me -- in a perpetual state of chaos."
Her heart beat out of her little bird cage chest as she shooed him, his clown afro and big red nose out of her trailer.
"You sure know how to make a clown cry," he said.
Zoe made a run for it, with her backpack and aerial gear, as soon as the last trailer light was extinguished. Lucky for
her mission that the tents were illuminated from the outside to create a starry, starry night effect for passersby and
circus enthusiasts.
The trickiest part of her plan was to climb up a cable that spanned the entire height of the animal tent. But having
scaled everything from poles to fabrics to ropes, Zoe felt confident that she could make it to the top. Before mounting
the cable, she slipped on trapeze gloves with gripping material. Then, like an upside down tightrope walker, she inched
her way up the cable to the apex of the tent. Playing to crowds of thousands was never as nerve-wracking as this.
She felt wobbly, shaky, and unstable. Noodle knees, they called it in the circus biz -- something she hadn't felt since
circus arts school.
At the apex of the tent, she gripped the tip and peeked into its small opening. Zoe would have to secure her rigging to
the outside of the tent. She clipped her carabineers to two opposing cables. Normally rigging should be more
extensive, but she would have to forgo a secure setup for a makeshift one. In circus arts school, the instructors
warned aerialists to never, ever cut corners when rigging.
Like a seamstress threading a needle, she poked the fabric through the slight opening at the top of the tent. She
watched it cascade down to the…lions! She would have to lower herself into a den of lions to get to the elephants!
She hadn't figured lion taming into her plan.
Zoe popped her head through the top like a malfunctioning jack-in-the box and saw that the elephants were catty-
corner from the lions. If she could get past the lions, she knew that the cages were conjoined without locks.
Had she had a tremulous nature, Zoe would not have attempted the elephant heist through the lion's den. But
cowardly girls don't join the circus as aerialists. Performing death-defying feats was her specialty. As Zoe slithered
down the fabric, she kept her eyes peeled on the lions. A lioness in the corner had spotted her and had started to
pace. Zoe wrapped herself up in the fabric cocoon -- attempting to give the impression that she was a giant red
creature towering over the restless feline. In her cocoon, she descended the rest of the way. The feline was frozen
with the look of a curious but crotchety old man. When Zoe's feet touched the earth, she whispered to the lion in a
comforting tone, the way she used to talk to her family cat. She crept sideways toward the cage door -- never turning
her back on the lion. The lion moved toward her, and as panic seized Zoe's arms and legs, the lion opened her mouth
and released a giant, toothy, tongue-protruding yawn.
"Oh, I don't scare you; I bore you. That's good. That's very, very good," she said, waves of relief relaxing her taut
limbs. The bored feline plopped down and rested her giant head on her paws.
Zoe clicked open the cage door handle, walked through a hall that led directly to the elephants' back entrance. Pausing
to breathe a sigh of relief over not becoming kitty chow, she didn't worry that her plan would fail or that a circus top
dog might be on her trail. She also didn't think about the strands of fabric flapping in the lion's cage -- evidence more
damning than fingerprints.
***
Zoe led Jujube down criss-crossing roads to the highway. After two hours of cajoling, the pair finally reached the
highway at 3:20 am. Zoe was now intimately familiar with the meaning of "lumbering elephant." To move Jujube along,
she bribed her with bananas, mangos, and apples she had pilfered from the circus cafeteria.
The main road was a long stretch of deserted highway. Occasional trucks would pass, but didn't spot Zoe and Jujube
in the shadows. Holding her trunk, she guided her to the other side of the highway and stood there, thinking about
the thrill she was about to give weary truckers. She hadn't thought of what might happen if law enforcement officials
found her or had she considered the trouble she'd be in for stealing circus property.
Thirty minutes had passed before she spotted a dim light in the distance. She stuck her thumb out, although she was
well aware that her thumb would be upstaged by a hitchhiking elephant. The headlights brightened as the car
approached and then whizzed past. It was a sports car doing at least 100 mph. Several minutes later, she saw a truck
illuminated with cab lights; she hoped it might be big enough to fit Jujube, who was now fidgety. A fidgety elephant
was a bit problematic, Zoe discovered. And she had nothing else to bribe her with; Jujube had depleted her backpack
full of fruit in a span of two hours.
"Jujube, hold still," she pleaded as the truck flashed its high beams and then slowed to a stop next to her.
"Well, God damn! God damn! Darlin', I was clearing the angel dust from my eyes back there and shaking myself awake,
thinking I had done near started to doze. Am I hallucinatin' or is that an elephant you got there, little missy?" shouted
the trucker, with his arm resting on the side of his cab.
"Sir, you're not hallucinating. It is indeed an elephant. Her name is Jujube."
"And my name is Billy Ray. Are you two runnin' away from home or somethin'?"
"Oh no, sir."
"For Lord's sake, don't tell me she's your pet. Jeez, people are going off the deep end with pets these days. Back
when I was young, folks were just fine with puppies and kittens. Now people have to have exotics -- snakes, giant
lizards, and now... jiminey crickets, elephants."
"She's not my pet, sir."
"Well pardon me for pryin', but why are you hitchhikin' with an elephant at this ungodly hour? It ain't normal for a girl
to hitchhike at all, let alone with an elephant, you know."
Zoe looked up at Jujube and then back at Billy Ray. "Got enough room in there
for an elephant?"
Billy Ray was so tickled by her question; he slammed the side of his truck with his palm and let out a yelp that startled
Jujube. When he got a hold of himself and quelled the laughing aftershocks that sounded like hootin' and hollerin' with
a lid on them, he said, "Sorry little missy, I don't mean to offend, but this takes the cake for strange situations on the
road, you know?" Then like a kid trying not to laugh in class, he pinched his nose and asked, "Where you headed?"
"Hohenwald, Tennessee."
"What's down there?"
"Elephant sanctuary."
"You mean like a place where elephants can pray?"
"Something like that," Zoe said, thinking this could be a hard sell.
"Is this an elephant rescue or somethin'?" He gave Zoe a knowing wink and smiled a pumpkin smile. Billy Ray seemed
so proud of his inference that he appeared ready and willing to be an accomplice. "'Fraid I'm headed in the wrong
direction. Let me see if I can get my buddy who's trailin' me by 30 minutes. Hold your horses, er... elephants." His
hysterics threatened to resurface after his little funny, but he swallowed so hard his Adam's apple bobbed down and
up, and his giggles went down his gullet.
Billy Ray called his friend and discovered that highway patrol cars were on the trail of a hit and run.
"Well, I'll be damned. He says the highway patrol 're comin'. We've gotta hide you and your friend, missy. Otherwise,
they'll pick you up for hitchhikin' and I'm not sure what the charge would be for the elephant. That's one they
probably don't have in their books. Woo-wee! If this ain't the wildest night I've had in the last 25 years on the road!"
The only problem was that Jujube didn't want to cooperate with the plan.
"Don't they say, stubborn as an elephant?" Billy Ray commented as they pushed Jujube's behind in tandem to no
avail. Two hundred ninety pounds of humans pushing 7,000 pounds of elephant. Zoe had failed to include this in her
calculations.
"I think it's stubborn as a mule," said Zoe. "C'mon Jujube. C'mon," Zoe urged the elephant as she attempted to guide
her into the tractor-trailer. "Scoot!!"
"We can scare the bejesus out of her."
"No, I don't want to do that."
"It's either that or... those highway patrol men will be comin' along before you can say jack rabbit or, in this case,
Jujube elephant." He was clearly having the time of his life. Zoe was certain that hiding an elephant beat endless
stretches of open highway and cornfields any day. Cornfields!
"Hey, I think I know something that will work. Can you go grab some corn over there?" She pointed to the corn field.
"Maybe we'll lure her in with corn."
Sure enough, Billy Ray and Zoe moved 7,000 pounds of elephant with two kilos of corn. He lowered the automated
tractor-trailer door and told Zoe to get into his cab and duck.
"Don't want the fuzz to think there's any monkey business goin' on. Little do they know there's elephant business!"
He was in hysterics about his joke; Zoe faked a laugh for good measure. After all, he was her accomplice in the
elephant caper.
A few minutes later, the state troopers pulled up to Billy Ray's tractor-trailer. The troopers with wide brimmed hats
and stiff posture appeared from behind the tinted power window.
"Everything okay in there?" shouted the passenger-side trooper.
"A-OK, sirs! Couldn't be better!" answered Billy Ray with an A-OK sign to match.
"You're not having any trouble with your cab?" asked the trooper.
"Nope, she's runnin' like a champ." At the "p" in champ, Jujube kicked the trailer wall so hard, the truck shimmied. The
state troopers did a well-choreographed double take.
"What, you got a horse in there or something? You wouldn't be following regulations if that were the case," said the
trooper behind the wheel. "Gotta be traveling with a regulation trailer. I'm afraid we'd have to give you a citation and a
hefty fine for that."
"No, sir, the cargo shifts from time to time. That's all," said Billy Ray without hesitation.
"Might want to secure it before too long," said the passenger-side trooper, stating the obvious. Jujube kicked again,
with greater force. In her crunched and ducked position, Zoe felt like an appendage to her pounding heart. She
scrunched her eyes, shook her head, and begged Jujube to stop.
"Well, I'll be. You sure called it. I'll be spendin' some time securin' my cargo at the next truck stop. She'll be tight as a
drum," said Billy Ray. Zoe had to hand it to her accomplice; he was smooth and polished with the law. Some people's
super heroes were suave muscle men swooping down in capes; hers was now officially a hillbilly trucker.
The patrolmen conferred for a few minutes, their stiff hats tilting and straightening as they fiddled with their overly
equipped uniforms and squad car. Ten minutes after stopping to check on Billy Ray's truck, the troopers flipped on the
red, white, and blue flashers. Nothing quite as patriotic as enforcing the law.
Zoe's sigh of relief ricocheted back into her throat and became a lump she couldn't swallow. If she hadn't know any
better, she would have thought that her heart had come unhinged and had relocated to her head.
The passenger-side officer got out. "We're going to need to take a look for ourselves, there, mister. I can smell it
when something ain't right. Get out of your cab, hands in the air. Is there anyone else in the truck with you?"
Billy Ray didn't really know how to answer that. There were two someone elses -- a runaway girl and her storybook
pet. He wasn't sure, though, if elephants counted as someone or something.
"Sir, answer the question or I'll have to search the entirety of the truck."
Billy Ray shot Zoe a what-the-hell-do-we-do-now glance, and said, "Yes, there's someone else. She'll be right out." He
motioned with his startled eyeballs for her to come out of hiding. Then he jumped out of the cab with his hands up --
panicked on the inside, calm on the outside. He took his time opening the tractor-trailer, while he wracked his brain to
come up with a good story. His lame brain wasn't producing anything worth a can of beans. As he threw open the
door, the patrolman's face lit up like a little boy's at a circus. "Well, I'll be damned. My name ain't Gus, if that's not an
elephant. That there is a real-life honest-to-goodness elephant!" He repeated the words for his disbelieving eyes and
radioed his partner that he had to come see "the cargo" for himself. When he said "cargo," he let out an ironic snort.
The other state trooper raced around the cab, ready to assist his partner in this all-important mission, looked up, and
said, "Jesus H. Christ, it's an elephant! Gus, what do you know -- it's a god damned elephant!"
Bud, now trying his best to maintain a modicum of law enforcement composure said, "What are your plans concerning
this elephant? I don't s'pose you're the rightful owner now. Are you? You two with the circus or something?"
Billy Ray did some fast talking, "Yes, indeedy, this beaut sure is mine. We keep her down on the farm for hauling
crops, hay, and such. Best dern farm animal we've ever had. Better than a horse, donkey, and a mule rolled into one."
"A farm elephant. That's a new one, ain't it, Gus?"
"Why you hauling her around in your eighteen wheeler?" asked Gus.
"That's a fair question, sir. Well, it's a sad story, really. You see she's got some kind of serious condition with her
trunk -- clogged hose or something -- and ain't no vet in these parts can do elephant plumbing, as you can imagine. A
clogged hose on an elephant is like having plumbin', eatin', and grippin' problems all rolled into one. You can just
imagine the severity of that. So we have to take her to a special clinic down south."
"Where's that at?" asked Gus.
"Tennessee. Closest vet specializing in unclogging elephant trunks."
The patrolmen were stymied, unsure of their next move. Then Bud said, "Gus, what are the regulations concernin' the
transporting of elephants?"
Despite his attempts to be a law enforcement man in charge, Gus looked at Bud and let out an explosive guffaw. He
threw his head back and laughed the uncontrollable laugh of a man who normally kept his laughter under lock and key.
Bud puffed up his chest and tightened his arms flexed over his gun belt. He shot Gus a reprimanding glare and shook
his head at the unprofessionalism of his partner. But as Gus's laughter spiraled out of control, Bud couldn't hold back
any longer and released a belly laugh that could've been heard on the west side of Kansas.
There they were -- elephant thief, accomplice, and uproarious law enforcement officers, all peering up at an elephant's
rump, contemplating The Elephant Problem.
Keeping score in her head with each action and reaction, Zoe saw this as a very positive development in the elephant
caper. As she had learned from her stint with the circus, entertained folks are happy folks -- more lenient and
forgiving. She waited for their next move.
"Listen, here, what did you say your name was -- Billy Ray?" Gus asked.
"Yes, sir."
"And who's this here little lady you got with you?" Gus winked at Zoe.
"That's Sarah Jane, my youngest." Zoe dipped into an abbreviated curtsied to play along.
"Cutie pie -- that one. Gonna be a heartbreaker." Gus eyed Zoe up and down and up again.
Eyeballing was part of a state trooper's job perks, Zoe figured. If she didn't have an elephant rescue underway, she
might have shot him a get-your-eyeballs-off-my-body look. Instead she struck a coy pose -- biting her lip and casting
her gaze downward.
"Already is, sir. Already is," said Billy Ray, with a forlorn look on his face, shaking his head for effect.
"Bud and I have decided," although Bud hadn't decided a thing, "that we'll have to issue a citation for improper
elephant transport procedures. It'll be a $600 fine. Once you get her to where she's goin', and get her trunk
unclogged and all that, you'll have to make sure that you follow appropriate rules and regulations upon her return. If
you don't, we'll issue a warrant for your arrest for illegal elephant activities. Is that clear?"
"Yes, sir. I'll make sure it's by the letter of the law." He winked at Zoe, who had started breathing again.
Gus wrote up a ticket and handed it to Billy Ray, "Alright, drive safe now and good luck with your elephant plumbing
problem." As the state troopers walked off, Zoe heard Bud say, "Elephant transport procedures?" Gus and Bud broke
out in hysterics again.
Zoe had never seen such jolly state troopers in her life. She started to believe that Jujube was a talisman.
***
Four states, five truck stops, ten pit stops, seven kilos of corn, four hamburgers, and three six-packs of Coca Cola
got Zoe and Billy Ray to Hohenwald, Tennessee. As they drove past the sanctuary gates, Zoe's eyes rested on the
expanse of lush pastureland and barns.
"Well, now what?" asked Billy Ray.
Zoe's plan ended at "Arrive at the elephant sanctuary". "Um, I guess just let her out."
"I doubt they just want people dropping off random elephants," noted Billy Ray.
"I'm guessing it probably doesn't happen too often."
"No, Sarah Jane, you've got that right," he said. He had taken to calling her Sarah Jane after the state trooper
incident, and added that he wanted to adopt her. She thanked Billy Ray kindly, but told him the father position was
already filled.
As they were deciding what to do next, a woman with blonde pigtails, high color, and dirty overalls was approaching
the truck with a stern expression and her arms in a stop-go-back position. "Can I help you?" she called up to Zoe and
the Billy Ray. "Who are you? Unauthorized vehicles are not allowed on this property. You must leave the premises
immediately," she ordered as she pointed toward the exit gate.
Zoe leaned out of the truck window and shouted down to her. "I've, well, we've rescued an elephant named Jujube
from the Barkley Brothers Circus and I was hoping you'd provide a home to her. She's a young one."
The pigtailed woman's stern face softened and she extended her arms, beckoning Zoe out of the truck. Zoe obliged
and jumped down. From military guard to nurturing earth mama in a matter of seconds, the woman gave Zoe an
extended hug -- longer than Zoe's closest friends or relatives would ever embrace her. As she pushed Zoe back to
take a look at her, she said, "Call me Ellie, short for, what else, elephant! Bless you, child. Bless you." She put her arm
around her and guided her to the back of the truck, as if it were pre-orchestrated for Ellie to take the plan from here.
"I assume our angel is back here." She laughed. "Silly me, where else would she be?"
Zoe called Billy Ray and asked him to open the trailer.
"Dear, dear, dear. Sweet Jujube. How long have you had her on the road?"
"16 hours."
"Oh my. Poor dear. I'll bet she's famished." Billy Ray pried open the door and Jujube's tail end was exposed. "Oh, she's
a beauty!"
Zoe looked up at Jujube's behind, puzzled and said, "Um, how can you tell?"
"Listen; she's in good shape compared to most. We get them after they've suffered years and years of abuse. You've
done a great thing—the best years of her life are ahead of her. The others will adore her!" Ellie's pigtails bobbed as
she bounced up and down on her tiptoes.
Zoe wondered if spending so much time with elephants made a person a little kooky.
"So, she's a female—right?"
"Yes, why?"
"Oh, thank goddess." Ellie put her hands together in prayer. "We only take female elephants."
"Really? Why?"
"Because it isn't natural for adult female and male Asian elephants to live together. Asian elephants are matriarchal by
nature; they live in herds of related females and only very young males."
As Ellie maneuvered Jujube out of the truck, Zoe noticed a nearby elephant that looked as though she were holding a
paintbrush with her trunk and painting on a giant canvas secured to a tree.
"Um, Ellie, what is that elephant doing?" Zoe asked as she pointed at the painting elephant.
Without looking over, Ellie replied, "Oh, that's Tempo. She's one of our most accomplished acrylic artists. Once we get
Jujube settled, you should go take a look at her work. We display it in our gallery."
Zoe mouthed "wow" but no words came out. This was truly not the circus anymore.
As Ellie nuzzled with, whispered to and coddled Jujube, she said, "You might be interested to know that Tempo is our
most famous elephant. She was in the 1970s show, Born Free. Of course, you're too young to remember that show.
She was born in Uganda in 1971 and was orphaned because of poachers."
After Ellie made sure that Jujube had enough food and water, she invited Zoe and Billy Ray into the administrative
offices for tea and biscuits. Billy Ray declined, saying he'd take a catnap in his cab.
"So is she safe? I mean if the circus comes looking for her?" Zoe asked, munching on a biscuit.
"No, she's not completely safe. Legally, the circus has the right to take her back. And they can press charges against
you for stealing their property."
"I don't think they will," said Zoe.
"How can you be so sure?" Ellie asked.
Zoe held up her cell phone and played the video of the elephant beating for Ellie. "Let's just say this footage -- as
rough as it is -- would look awfully suspicious next to the we-coddle-our-elephants video that they play for the crowd
every night."
"Please, please turn that off. I can't bear it," Ellie said as she turned her face away. "So they know you have this?"
"Yes, Mr. Barkley himself saw it after he broke into my trailer one night." Zoe laughed and continued, "I gave him a
private screening of the evidence. In response, he told me if I spilled the beans, he would make sure I never worked in
any circus ever again."
"I suppose you're right, then, about the circus not pressing charges or coming after Jujube. Thank God. But are you
concerned that he might have the power to blackball you?"
"Maybe with the traditional circuses, but I doubt he has much clout with Cirque de Soleil. Fortunately, they don't see
eye to eye."
***
As Zoe and Billy Ray left the sanctuary, she saw an elephant wading in a pond, spouting water like an elegant fountain.
She dipped her trunk into the pond and trumpeted the water all over her body. On closer inspection, Zoe saw that it
was Jujube, wily, muddy and wet. Zoe could have sworn Jujube was smiling at her.
***
As Elementala was opening in Toronto, Zoe learned that the Barkley Brothers Circus was under investigation for using
bullhorns and chaining their elephants. Although she wasn't sure who had been the source of leak, she was pleased
with this development.
Elementala, the newest Cirque de Soleil show, opened with bonfires on stage and smoke wafting up to the top of the
tent. Fire dancers and breathers played with, juggled, and swallowed the flames. The show featured the four elements
-- air, fire, water, and earth.
Fire gave way to air -- Zoe's part of the show. Starting in the flames and ascending through smoke, she would slither
up a transparent fabric swath to the top of the tent. She looked as if she were dancing on air, arching, swinging,
plunging, and twirling while defying gravity. The crowd murmured, yelped, and cheered as she performed. As she
descended, air gave way to water. No one seemed to miss the elephants.
Every time Zoe danced on fabric, she imagined Jujube reveling in his pond. Jujube in water, the Barkley Brothers Circus
under fire, she in air, and Billy Ray traversing the earth below.
Elemental bliss.
Ann Tinkham
